Sign Language (After Thoughts).

I just don't know―
one minute I want to leave,
the next minute I want to stay.

for I can't read where your heart is―
and I'm misinterpreting your
silent and subliminal messages
as a door existing between you and I

a door that's closed, and I'm
     without a key

we've made friendships,
     we've hoped desires,
          we've shared intimacies,
               we've made ecstasies, 
                    and we've watch the passions
               of our bodies rise like the sun that rose
          as we laid in each other's arms
after thoughts

became realities, and dreams
became recollections of what we shared―

we watched the alarm clock
tick away the time
for me to hold you tight.

though in bed, my body couldn't be still―
tossing and turning like the princess on the pea
on the uncomfortable feeling that

I confused your lust,
     with your heart
          and made you apart of my world,
               without any gravitational leverage
                    to pull your feelings towards my affection.
               and my thoughts now ramble and shuffle,
          like your hands on my head when
     i geared in on your spot
while your legs first locked

my head―then my heart into place;
     without a key

after I rise and we’re face to face
     I confront feelings of inconsistency,
          feelings of confusion,
     after thoughts
                    of acceptance were once here?
               that's why

I just don't know―
one minute I want you to stay,
the next minute I want you to go.

Mark Anthony Thomas
Copyright © 2004

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